Inilah erti rindu bagiku

Ku tepis air titisan air mata

satu per satu

yang makin rancak bergenang

tatkala terpandang
Kaabah yang tergamam indah
dikerumuni ribuan hamba terpilih
mahupun pabila terkenang
kubah Masjidil Nabawi

yang menghijau nan subur

petanda semadinya junjungan tercinta

yang masih mendoakan

syafaat bagi umatnya 

Beginikah rasa hati

mereka yang pernah Kau anugerahkan

peluang menjadi tetamu Mu,Ya Allah?

Mungkinkah disaat ini, jutaan mata

mengalirkan kerinduan hati

seperti aku disini?

Betapa besarnya anugerahMu

pada kami umat akhir zaman

walau tidak pernah bertentang mata
atau hidup sewaktu utusan-utusanMu
namun masyaAllah
tarikan hati kami
padaMu, agamaMu, rasulMu
begitu erat, begitu kuat

aku mensyukuri hidayahMu,Ya Allah

sungguh,aku terharu..

Terjawab sudah bagiku

mengapa para sahabah dan keluarga baginda

begitu utuh dibelakang baginda

jika aku ,insan kerdil lagi hina

mampu merasakan cinta , rindu dan kasih

pada Kaabah,pada Mekah, pada Madinah

dengan hanya sekali menjejakkan kaki di tanah suciMu

apatah lagi mereka  yang berada 24/7 disisi baginda

melihat wajah putih suci baginda

mencontohi baginda

melihat sendiri senyum manis, tawa tangis baginda SAW

..Sungguh aku merindui RasulMu itu,Ya Allah

Sungguh aku ingin berubah menjadi umatnya yang berjaya

ingin aku melihat wajahnya,mendapat syafaatnya

Maka,layakkanlah aku ya rabb

untuk kembali ke rumahMu
Layakkanlah aku
untuk menjadi ahli syurgaMu
layakkanlah aku

untuk melihat wajahMu dan kekasihMu Muhammad SAW

..layakkanlah aku ya Allah

dengan mengampuni dosa-dosaku

Wallahi,

apa yang kurasakan ini

itulah ertinya sebuah rindu bagiku

tiada yang mampu mengganti

kenangan yang telah Kau anugerahi

Jemputlah aku kembali

sebagai tamuMu,Ya Allah..(amin)

:*(

~Nisha~

Indahnya Taubat

Bergenang air mata

mengenangkan dosa

Yang bertimbun aku longgokkan

Dek kerna kerakusan nafsu

Jauh ku lari

Dari landasan hakiki

Alpa dgn nikmat dunia

Aku muflis saham akhirat

Tapi sayangMu, ya Allah

Pada ku yang telah jauh menyimpang

Tetap utuh

Kau menjentikkan kesedaran

Mengembalikan ingatan

bahawa Kau memerhatikanku

dan inginku kembali ke-jalanMu

Aku yang tersungkur dalam kebodohan

Kau bangunkan dgn keinsafan

Kau Maha mulia Ya Allah

Maha Pengasih, Maha Pengampun

Betapa kerdilnya aku

Yang gagal mencintaiMu

walau sebesar zarah

Berbanding kasihMu

yang melimpah keatasku

Indahnya taubat ini

Yang memuliakan airmataku

Dengan tangisan kerna menginsafi kasihMu

Kekalkan aku Ya Allah

Dalam lindungan rahmat dan sayangMu

Jauh dari liku kehidupan yang memesongkan

Layakkanlah aku,ya Allah

Untuk bertemu,melihat wajahMu

Terimahlah hadiahMu untukku

Taubatku kepadaMu.

AsyhaduAl Laa ilaha illallah,wa asyhadu anna muhammadar rasulAllah

~Nisha~

17 Feb 2012

Sedangkan Nabi menghadapi sakitnya sakratul maut..bagaimanakah dgn kita?

Assalamualaikum,

Alhamdulillah, malam tadi (3-Feb-2012) ana berpeluang menghadiri ceramah sempena Maulidur Rasul. Terharu,terkedu sebentar mendengar hari2 menjelang kewafatan baginda. Kesan daripada memakan kambing yg tlh diracuni oleh wanita Yahudi yg bernama Zainab,baginda deman2 dan sakit2 sendi sehinggakan tidak terperi sakitnya itu. Badan baginda begitu panas sehingga baginda pernah pitam berkali2 ketika cuba bangun untuk mendirikan solat. Maka baginda menyuruh kepada Aisyah agar memyampaikan pesan pada sahabat baginda agar  mendapatkan baginda air dari 7 buah perigi , dalam 7 buah bekas berasingan. Apabila sudah disiapkan, maka baginda SAW mandi menggunakan air tersebut, dan dengan izin Allah kebah sikit demam baginda sehingga mampu mengimamkan solat. Namun selang beberapa waktu, badan baginda panas kembali sehinggakan pabila disapu air ke wajah baginda, dalam sekelip mata air itu kering. Juga dikhabarkan bahawa bahang panas badan baginda itu masih terasa walau baginda telh diselimutkan dengan beberapa helai kain tebal. Urat2 baginda terasa bagai diputus dek kerana racun tersebut. Apabila Aisyah menyoal mengapakan baginda yang merupakan Nabi kesayangan Allah melalui kesakitan sedemikian, maka kata baginda ,apa yg dilaluinya adalah sakratul maut. Baginda juga menyifatkan kesakitan azab sakratul maut ini berkali ganda sakitnya berbanding umatnya.

Melayang fikiran saya sejenak.
Jika Nabi,kekasih Allah itu menerima azab kesakitan ketika nyawa baginda dicabut sedikit demi sedikit, bagaimana pula halnya untuk kita nanti? Apa kita yakin amal kita sudah cukup untuk kita dicabut nyawa tanpa rasa sakit? Gambaran nyawa dicabut ialah seperti ditusuk pedang yg berjeriji dan kemudian dicabut keluar pedang tersebut. Itu baru satu gambaran mikro. Yg sebenarnya ?Allah yang tahu.
Yang pasti sakit sakratul maut itu wujud. Dan sesungguhnya maut itu sendiri adalah pasti. Yang kita harus fikirkan ialah bagaimana untuk persiapkan diri menghadapi sakratul maut dan alam barzakh nanti..bagaimana keadaan diri kita tatkala dibangkitkan kelak?Apakah akan bangga Nabi SAW melihat kita?

Takut,telalu takut untuk membayangkan suasana di alam kubur. Kita keseorangan.Teman kita cuma amal kita. Solat kita sempurna kah? Cukupkah 'jangka hayat' solat itu untuk menerangi kubur kita nanti? Apa kita punyai semua jawapan pada soalan Munkar Nakir?

Semoga kita berhenti menyibukkan diri dalam  hal2 duniawi. Tak perlu layankan gosip2 artis, tak perlu terasa jiwang2 karat, emosi bagai nak rak. Kumpul dan alihkan semua energy itu kearah menguatkan iman kita. Tujuan kita dimuka bumi adalah sebagai khalifah. Tidakkah kita malu meminta2 pada Allah itu ini sedangkan kita tidak menjalankan tugas kita? Jangankan melakukan tanggunjawab sebagai khalifah, apa pernahkah kita berDOA agar kita menjadi Khalifah yg baik? Tak. Yang kita tanya cinta,rezeki, jodoh dan kekayaan mungkin.

Muslimin muslimat sekalian, usia kita makin singkat hari demi hari. Mati pula menyakitkan. Paling tidak,kita cari bekal agar diakhirat kelak boleh kita senang lenang.
Jangan sampai kita kaya dimuka bumi ini tapi muflis dan dalam kepapaan di akhirat kelak :(
Nauzubillahiminzalik.

Sometimes ..

Sometimes,
I long for solitude
so my emotions could take charge
and rip the deceitful mask I wear
revealing the truth
behind each smiles I fake

sometimes,
I wish to cry out aloud
and tear my lungs apart
spitting out the pain I ingest
in every breath I swallowed

sometimes,
just sometimes..
I wanted to believe
that someone would actually notice
the missing sparkles in my eyes
and offer to know why..

but sadly,
hopes gets crushed
along with the heart
..
..
sometimes.



~Nisha~
10.08pm
29 Dec 2011

Rotten Aqidah IS our fault..

Assalamualaikum,

You can’t run away from feeling dismayed, disappointed and even enraged when you look at some of the headlines on newspaper, especially one that reveals the aqidah state of our fellow muslims. Granted, none of us are free from sin and of course, I am of no exception either. I have had my fair share of sin I’ve committed out of my own stupidity over the years. Yet hearing about cases of teen being impregnated by their boyfriends, seeing some of them parading their beauty in online mediums just to get (and seek) attention of their male followers, allowing their erotic acts be recorded on camera in the name of love (to be kept as memorabilia ..pffttt) etc, is hard to digest. Why are these things still happening despite the numerous news and warnings on such behavior and its consequences have been highlighted before? Why aren’t these girls learning anything at all? Does being an object of desire means so much to them that they let go of their morals in the name of love and fame? Why the blind trust on their so-called boyfriends –did they really think that none of the things reported in the news would ever happen to them?

Blind trusts aside, what worries me is how women easily let their guards down in the name of love. Have they forgotten the ultimate aim in life is to love and worship the Creator of this universe and not idolize or be idolized by any tom,dick or harry instead?

To whom the worldly life is dearer than the Hereafter, and who prevent from the way of Allah and wish deviations in it; they are in extreme error. [Ibrahim 14:3]

We get engrossed with the fun and fame of this world that we easily neglect our purpose in life. Who do we blame? The upbringing? It’s not an easy task for parents to be guarding their children 24/7 but nurturing the child and instilling religion as strong foundation from a young age could have made some difference. Could have.

It’s such a sad fact that in wanting to provide sustenance for the family we love, we overlook the importance of giving our children the required dosage of spirituality which can be the one thing they can use as shield in facing this ruthless world.

So I bring you back to the question of Aqidah – why do we easily forego God? Why do we forget that this world is but a mere transit place before we go to our eternal placing? We all KNOW this and at least have heard of it, yet is it the fact that it’s not to be experienced until after our death is making it easy for us to shove it at the back of our head, if not completely wiped out of our mind?

What do we do to tackle this matter? We can’t carry on our lives ignoring our surrounding. We should not be stepping back because we don’t want to poke our nose in somebody else’s business. It IS our business. Everybody’s. These girls, these women are part of us, our society. More so if they are also fellow Muslims, we are obligated to repair their aqidah. By ‘minding own business’, we are actually telling God that we don’t care about what He has ordained.

Whoever works righteousness, whether male or female, while he (or she) is a true believer (of Islamic Monotheism) verily, to him We will give a good life (in this world with respect, contentment and lawful provision), and We shall pay them certainly a reward in proportion to the best of what they used to do (i.e. Paradise in the Hereafter).[Al-Nahl 16:97]

Let us find strength to fight our own desires and correct ourselves in the way our deen require from us. We don’t have to go state to state to preach. Let us begin by being a role model to our own family. Lets expand from there. We can’t preach what we don’t practice,yea? When we work on improving ourselves in being a obedient Muslim, we then can find courage to extend our knowledge to others. Instill strong foundation in our children that Allah comes first ,more than anything else in this world. No one who makes us stray can lead us to Jannah. They need to know this and it IS our duty as a parents,siblings,family and friends to guide whom we see have digress from this path.

Let us seek protection from Allah that moving forward He may keep us safe from deviating the deen’s teachings and may He give us a heart that hates everything and everyone who disobeys Allah. Amin

“So do not ever assume that Allah will not fulfil His promise to His Noble Messengers; indeed Allah is the Dominant, the Avenger. On the day when the earth will be changed to other than this earth, and the heavens - and they will all come forth standing before Allah, the One, the Dominant above all. And on that day you will see the guilty linked together in chains. Their cloaks will be of pitch and fire will cover their faces. In order that Allah may repay each soul what it had earned; indeed Allah spends no time in judging the account. This is the message to be conveyed to all mankind - and in order to warn them with it, and for them to know that He is the only One God, and for men of understanding to heed advice. [Ibrahim 14:47-52]”


May we scintillate -Islamically :)

Keikhlasan

Assalamualaikum,

Setelah sekian lama tidak melakar kata di lembaran maya, terdetik hati untuk mencurah fikiran di minda hari ini. Segalanya bermula tatkala mata terpandang sesuatu kelebihan rakan berbanding diri. Terdetik di hati persoalan 'apa kekurangan usaha diriku?'. Namun, aku 'redha' ,menepiskan persoalan yang timbul ke belakang benak minda. Usah dilayan,kata hati.

Ternyata aku tidak 'ikhlas'.

Sewaktu solat terawih melangkaui 12 rakaat,mulalah keletihan melanda dan pelbagai fikiran datang menjenguk. Perbandingan antara kelebihan rakan berbanding diri timbul kembali. Selang seli ku tepis, tidak ingin hilang keusyukan solat, tetapi kebangkitan persoalan kekurangan diri kali ini menebal. Sehinggakan selepas tarawih ku rasa keletihan minda. Suatu perasaan suram melanda. Aku sedih,

Keadaan berlarutan tika subuh. Fikiranku masih membisikkan kata 'simpati' pada diriku. Berulang kali aku katakan pasrah dan redha,tapi ternyata aku tidak ikhlas.

Menjelang zohor , aku berusaha untuk membaca surah al-hasr ayat ke-10 ,memohon agar Allah menghapuskan rasa 'dengki' hatiku. Apa aku dengki? Bukan,bukan dengan sahabatku. Tapi dengan kedudukan aku dikala itu.Mula aku mempersoalkan keikhlasan aku memandangkan begitu sukar utk aku menerima kata 'redha' yang seringkali mulut aku ucapkan.

Sejauh mana kita mengamalkan keikhlasan dgn Allah?

Kita kata kita redha, kita pasrah, Allah maha berkuasa, Allah penentu rezeki dll - apakah kita benar2 menyakini apa yg kita ungkapkan? atau ianya cuma sekadar luahan bibir yang tidak mampu mententeramkan hati kita?

Astagfirullahazim, Allah itu kan maha Adil. Jika kita terasa kekurangan dlm nikmat yg kita peroleh berbanding yang lain, apakah kita muhasabah diri mencari puncanya yg barangkali berasal dr diri kita sendiri? Mungkin usaha yg kita lakukan tidak setanding yg lain?
Acapkali kita mengatakan Allah uji hambanya yang Dia sayang, kerana ingin meninggikan martabat kita..sekali lagi aku bertanya -apakah kita benar2 redha atau sekadar kata pemanis mulut penyedap telinga sahaja?

Ku harap kita kaji diri kita sendiri,sejauh mana kita ikhlas kerana Allah dan demi Allah. Moga kita bersungguh-sungguh dalam meyakini bahawa Allah tahu apa yang baik dan buruk untuk kita. Mungkin apa yang pada fikiran kita baik,rupa2nya buruk untuk kita?

Banyakkan berdoa dgn airmata pada Allah agar memberi hati yg bebas dari hasad dengki,iri hati mahupun hati yang sayu dengan kekurangan diri. Carilah kekuatan dengan benar yakin dan Ikhlas padaNya,

رَبَّنَا اغْفِرْ لَنا وَ لِإِخْوانِنَا الَّذينَ سَبَقُونا بِالْإيمانِ وَ لا تَجْعَلْ في قُلُوبِنا رَبَّنَا اغْفِرْ لَنا وَ لِإِخْوانِنَا الَّذينَ سَبَقُونا بِالْإيمانِ وَ لا تَجْعَلْ في قُلُوبِنا Wahai Tuhan Kami! Ampunkanlah dosa kami dan dosa saudara-saudara kami yang mendahului kami dalam iman dan janganlah Engkau jadikan dalam hati perasaan hasad dengki dan dendam terhadap orang-orang yang beriman. Wahai Tuhan kami! Sesungguhnya Engkau Amat Melimpah belas kasihan dan rahmatMu.

Amin.

~Nisha~

If you could hear what I couldn't speak..

Assalamualaikum.

I am a sorry excuse for a blogger aren't I? If only what I thought in mind can directly find a way to type itself into this portal, then I dare say I'd have surpassed any maximum posts allowed limit ;if there was one :)
Such is the mind ,isn't it? 60 thousand thoughts per day,apparently.(God knows who had the time to make those counts!)

Anyway,yes, I have been wanting to write like everyday! I'd see something that I'd wanna be writing about, -some people, some character, some colour, some moments, some silence, some noises, some love, some hatred, some pain- you name it! almost anything I lay my eyes on will remind me of something I'd like to write about.However, I was just being plain lazy. I easily let work get in the way but mostly, my health have become a hindrance much to my dismay. But its okay, I'm here now.

You know, I had this sudden 'realization' yesterday :
'ahhh, what a noisy world it would have been had God made the voices of the heart be heard by all'

Can you imagine how would that have been if we all could just say everything we want without having to keep anything hidden? Man, wouldn't that get us in trouble!
The pro part of it is that people would know exactly what you want, but the worst is what you'd feel if they choose to clearly ignore that because they just couldn't be bothered? What would THAT do to our self-esteem? I mean, aren't we the kind to justify and 'forgive' someone for hurting us because we give them the benefit of the doubt that they did what they did because they do not understand our unspoken needs and wants? So what would happen if we no longer have that cushiony thought to hold on to anymore ? I shudder at the thought of how mankind could have been more cut throat and direct had this been the case.

Fortunately for us, the all Wise and Praise worthy God had granted  us these silent words...the kind that is only heard by you and known to Him alone. One that you could use when the verbal texts (and/or humans) fail you.
One that makes you wanna be grateful, for silence and secrets.

"...Did I not tell you that  I know the secrets of heaven and earth, and I know what ye reveal and what ye conceal" ( Quran 2:33)

May you scintillate!
~Nisha~