When prayer became secondary...

Assalamualaikum.

I decided to touch Al-Quran today after 'watching' it sitting majestically before my eyes for I-can't-remember-how-long. Often, I feel 'guilty' each time my eyes dawn upon the precious holy book of ours without me spending a decent 5minutes even to flip through its pages,let alone recite a surah. Today, I wanted to break that dry spell.

I have a copy of 'The Meaning of Holy Quran' by Abdullah Yusuf Ali - one of my favourite scholar. The Quran was a gift from my dad years ago;its something I hold very dear to my heart. Shame on me , my 'precious' Quran has become an object I love but failed to 'show' my affection on.

Much like how humans are with God, specifically in this context for me, to Allah SWT. Day in and day out we are blessed with so many things - with life, sight,hearing,touch,smell,sustenance - yet,how often do we thank Him?

I find myself spending awful lot of hours for work need, rushing to meet impossible deadlines even if it means I need to stay up at night. Yet I find myself giving excuses and lame reasoning of 'tired' and 'sleepy' about waking in the middle of the night to perform tahajjud (special,highly recommended prayer). Why did god, and seeking a spot in jannah had to take second place when compared to dunya? Why did I fear not meeting a deadline more than praying on time? How selfish I had become ;astagfirullahalazim.:(

I'd like to share a quote from Al-Quran narration which was made by Yusuf Ali about surah Al-Fatihah, that pretty much serves as a reminder to us all at times like this -where prayer has become a 'chore' or secondary:

"Allah needs no praise,for He is above all praise;He needs no petition,for He knows our needs better than we do ourselves; and His bounties are open without asking; to the righteous and the sinner alike. The prayer is for our own spiritual education,consolation and confirmation"

We pray for our own benefit in life and afterlife yet how easily we forsake that over trivial things. Here's hoping this had served as a reminder to us all.

May we repent and may our repentence be accepted Insya Allah.